


The End of Everything

by Kritty



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, Gen, I wrote this three years ago, Might not, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, might be a deathfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-19
Updated: 2015-08-19
Packaged: 2018-04-15 14:16:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4609809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kritty/pseuds/Kritty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When the Doctor died for good, nobody even noticed at first.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The End of Everything

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this a few years ago during break at work. I was crying while writing notes on little pieces of paper.  
> It just happened and I posted this little story on another website. I only now thought of posting it here.
> 
> For people who want to make their hurting heart all better again after reading this - there's a sequel.
> 
> Have fun *sends a virtual cookie*
> 
> PS: English is not my first language. However, I love helpful and gentle criticism :)

**The End of Everything**  
  
  
When the Doctor died for good, nobody even noticed at first.  
The world kept on turning, the universe kept existing and the human kind kept being noisy and magnificent. The Daleks were nowhere to be seen, the Cybermen weren't having a chance against Torchwood Pete's World anyway, and when New New York suddenly found ancient documents never seen before in the city archives, people noticed the Weeping Angels, old enemies of everyone, had somehow left the Universe too.  
So the Universe was happy and felt save and thought it knew everything, but in reality it was crumbling and dying and something was ending.  
  
\- and the TARDIS was in a time loop once again, after all these years, desperately crying for help in a voice nobody was able to hear anymore. She didn't explode, even though she wanted to.  
She saved the universe and nobody noticed there was one sun too much in the sky, in every sky.  
  
Not until a grey-haired John Smith entered his apartment, gasped and buckled over and Rose Tyler came running, fear on her face and something that looked like a sonic pencil in her shaking hands.  
_I'm gonna die, Rose,_ he said, grasping his girlfriend's hand, tears running down his freckled cheeks.  
_No you wont, what are you talking about?_  
_You gotta tell Torchwood. You got to_ , he growled, sinking down on his knees.  
And then Rose knew what was happening and turned white.  
The sonic device fell on the floor and her heart broke again, after all this time.  
  
And the TARDIS kept shining and burning, remembering the Doctor and her duty.  
  
River was the next one who noticed. She called him, send him messages, wrote gigantic letters on whole planets and even suns, almost started a war and altered two fixed events in time, but the Doctor never came and in her dreams she saw blue and orange and red, like a photo from almost forgotten times when the Doctor was still wearing bow-ties and fezzes.  
And she broke her sonic lipstick, went back to prison and demanded the telephone to be taken down and away.  
She wrote letters in red on her cell wall, in the tongue of lost civilizations, crazed phrases for her parents, who never read it, and she dreamt of a library that didn't exist but scared her so much she cried.  
  
When the TARDIS showed Melody Pond what had happened, she made sure she wasn't found. She wanted the universe to keep existing, it was what the Doctor would've wanted. So she hid from the Pond daughter who was also her's and knew she was dooming the child who had killed and married her Doctor, the last of the Time Lords, years and years ago.  
  
Jack went to a bar and wanted to stay there for more than 3 days, but he got thrown out and he punched a guy right in the face for the first time in ages. He killed himself again and again, just because he could, and he screamed and shouted and bled, because _they were supposed to live forever_ , together, the oldest souls in the Universe. And then he called Mickey and told him he got the news from Torchwood and listened to the devastated sobs coming from Martha, who was clawing at her husband until Mickey told Jack to wait and hung up.  
A few hours later, the three of them sat on a bank in Cardiff, John hugging Martha, feeling dead but not dead enough, Mickey sitting in front of them, his wheelchair telling them its condolences in a sad mechanic voice, not unlike K9.  
  
A week later John hugged a grieving Rhys Goodbye, left Gwen the flowers she had once liked best and left Torchwood for good, without further notice. His world was coming apart and it was time to try and find the TARDIS.  
  
The blue box was now being noticed by two cultures, their planets circling the mysterious sun, which was so different from all the others. They tried to come near it, to explore it, to find out what it was, but the TARDIS was clever and created terrible myths and horrible legends. So everybody saw the flaming sun, but nobody recognized it.  
  
And when Donna Noble sat in front of the television, feeding her Grandfather, she got sad and started to cry, because the recently discovered strange sun in the neighbourhood of their planet was beautiful, so beautiful, but the images made her heart and head hurt, and she wanted to scream. Wilfred Mott opened his tired eyes though, and he too started to cry and his old hands took Donna's, and together they cried, one remembering and hurting, one not being able to, but still hurting.  
  
The TARDIS realized she was being noticed more and more, too much, by too many now, and she considered to make the-one-who-must-never-remember remember so she could save the Universe again, but instead she tried to reach the Defender of the Earth and failed. So she tried to call The Pretty One and her child's mother who should be waiting somewhere, and she looked everywhere she could and burned and burned, but she couldn't find the beautiful Ponds, and she couldn't remember what had happened to them.  
  
And suddenly she was eager to remember everything, because she didn't want her fire to burn down. She remembered floppy hair and hilarious chins, big noses, leather jackets, freckles. She remembered colorful clothing and gray hair, toothy grins and worried frowning. She remembered a young soul in an old body, an old soul in a younger body, and gigantic scarves.  
She remembered companion after companion, and saw death and grief and darkness.  
  
Galaxies screamed in terror, peoples vanished in fear, when the fire got horrible and the sun almost exploded. A cry of horror echoed through the whole universe, nations prayed for the Doctor, through all systems and timelines. _Where is he, why isn't he saving us._  
Rumours were told, that he hadn't come for almost a century now, that he had vanished from existing because he found Gallifrey. The whole universe was drowning in chaos and violence. Revolutions started to take place, and cults were created. Wishes were made in every timeline, system and world that knew or had heard of the Doctor, but five weary souls sat together and forbid themselves to wish. All of them old but young, faces tired, some of them smiling, some of them crying, but all of them brave.  
  
_He's not dead._  
John is dead.  
He's not the Doctor.  
He wasn't John Smith either.  
Did somebody call Sarah-Jane's kids  
I did, they wont be able to help. But they're working on K9 again.  
They will come.  
Donna, the chip.  
It's working.... Rose, the captain sinks with his ship.  
Yes.  
Captain Harkness, the location.  
Got it.  
  
And they went out on a mission, their last mission to save the Universe and the burning ship.  
  
The TARDIS felt they were coming and she pulsed and growled, and then she began to cry and begged for them to find her, and then the sun slowly turned into something sad and dark. Years passed until there was a smooth marble in the sky, and peoples stopped to travel and stared in wonder and amazement, but nobody wanted to explore it, because myths and legends forbid them to visit this beautiful, sad thing that once had been the most horrible sun of all.  
  
And one day, the sad beautiful thing was gone and the humans got quiet, because they waited for something. The revolutions stopped, the cults quieted down and rumors changed into scared forebodings. _It wasn't a sun after all,_ people said suddenly. _It was the burning Doctor,_ people said. And now he's gone, just like Gallifrey vanished, years and years ago.  
And just like that, planets were grieving and everything kept being quiet and the Universe suddenly seemed to be dead.  
  
It forgot to be dead one day, though, because the generations who had met the Doctor died and took the real memories with them. New generations were born, that only lived with the stories about the Doctor, stories that were glorified and idolized and changed through the times of the Universe. And the people of the new generation asked themselves a question again and again. _How are we safe? Where did he go? How did he die?_  
But the Universe was tired of rumors and cults and revolutions, so the people lived their lives in grieving happiness. Books were written, films were made, plays were staged. The Doctor lived on, even though some people weren't actually sure he had ever existed in the first place.  
  
  
  
  
____  
End.


	2. Interlude

And somewhere on a cliff on Earth 1.0 in the solar system, there sat a young woman, next to a fairly old man on green grass. Waves swooshed 20 metres below them, producing white foaming spume. The man's blue eyes where fixed on the sky, like there was something important and gorgeous to admire.  
 _Why am I so sad sometimes, Jenny?_ the man said, without taking his eyes from the sky.  
 _Because you're a genius and the world doesn't know_ , the blonde woman said, laying a hand on his shoulder.  
 _Am I?  
Yes you are, Dad.   
Doesn't feel like it._  
The man shook his head and took his eyes of the sky, throwing a frustrated glance at his useless right leg.  
 _My brain doesn't make any sense most of the times. And my dreams, blimey, they're the dreams of a mad man._  
He ripped a bit of grass out and crumpled it in his fist.  
 _Sometimes, there's no difference. Genius, mad man. It's all the same. It's a good thing though, you know_ , the woman said. _In your case_ , she then added.  
 _In my case, huh?_ the man said wearily and threw the grass down the cliff, watching it fall.  
 _Where's your mother, Jenny?  
I told you. She's gone.  
Why can't I remember?_  
 _Something happened. You don't want to know.  
I'm your father, not a child._  
 _Dad, please,_ she said, then bit her lower lip and put a stray strand of grey hair behind her father's ear. _Stop asking. I don't want to tell you. Think of me, it hurts._  
Blue eyes watched her face, tired but curious, somehow different from the rest of his body.  
 _Do I have a friend named Pond, Amelia?_ He suddenly asked, still watching his daughter's face.   
She didn't show any signs of surprise or anger, she almost seemed bored.  
 _I don't know. I don't know all of your friends. You might have had a friend with that name once.  
Amelia Pond. Like a name in a fairy tale_he mumbled. _What about Rose. Do you know her?_  
The woman stared into his eyes, still not showing any emotions.  
 _She's not real, but you dream a lot about her. You got to remember that she's not real._  
At that, the man looked down at his hands and his eyes suddenly filled up.  
 _Dad, it's okay. It's the accident. It's going to be alright. Dad, you're going to be allright._  
She took the man's hand and kissed it tenderly.  
He nodded and hugged her hand to his heart, trying to make her feel the constant drumming of his heart, the heart that was so alone and sometimes annoyed him for reasons he didn't know.  
 _Today's not a good day,_ he mumbled.  
 _You've had worse_ , Jenny answered, resting her head on his shoulder.  
They didnt say anything for a while, watching the clouds and the sun and the water below them.  
 _I want to dye my hair red_ , the man suddenly said, and the younger woman turned her head and stared at him from below, a big smile on her face.  
 _You what?_  
 _I want to dye it. I want to be a ginger. I miss ginger, I love ginger._ He smiled a crooked smile at her, almost embarrassed.  
 _Okay. Let's buy some hair tinting lotion and do it_ , Jenny chuckled.  
 _But let's stay here some more. Lets do it tomorrow,_ nodded the man and gave her a little kiss on the cheek. She turned her head and gave a little nod in return, smiling. Her father didn't see, but her eyes were wet now.   
The Universe hadn't ended after all, even though the captain had never left his ship and the ship had just kept burning.  
No, it was alive, _so alive_.It wasn't yet ending, thanks to a whole generation and one old soul.  
Sometimes, it still felt like the end of everything, though.

 

 

___

TBC


	3. Pulling the puzzles apart (Going Back To The Start)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last one.  
> Hope you liked it :) <3

**Pulling the puzzles apart** (Going Back To The Start)  
  
  
The pain in his bad leg wasn't too much to handle nowadays.  
It was the headache that stole his breath sometimes, that made him close his eyes and turn his back on the world.  
On good days, it was just there, in the back of his head, a latent hammering.  
On bad days, it left him crippled and crying out in agony. He wont ever forget the day it had made him wet himself and Jenny had to calm him down when he was sobbing and grabbing her arm, not wanting to let go because he was drowning in despair and he just hadn't known why.  
He still didn't know why.  
  
This was a good day. He considered himself lucky, because he had been looking forward to this day for weeks. Jenny was meeting him at the sweet little hut behind the next hill, and they would eat all sorts of things, sleep in front of a fire place and Jenny had promised to read to him, which she hadn't done in a long time now.  
  
_Aren't you worried about me, Jenny?_ he had said a few days ago, when there were maps and papers spread out all over the table and they were planning his first hike – or maybe it was more of a trip or a walk, really – in what felt like a lifetime. Maybe it actually was a lifetime. Maybe this was his first walking-tour ever. He didn't remember.  
_Why should I be, Dad?_ Jenny had said, all smiles and excitement where worry and fear should've been.  
_Because I'm old and because I'm not quite whole. You said so, last week._ he had answered, and had put a hand over Jenny's busy one.  
Her eyes had met his then.  
_I didn't mean it like that. And if I did, I changed my mind._  
And that was it. They had planned the trip and he was even more excited to find out that Jenny didn't want to hike all the way with him but instead decided to wait for him and prepare the evening.  
  
So he was hiking towards the last hill, carefully placing his feet, feeling the press of his rucksack on his back and the roots of big impressive trees under his shoes. He had replaced his cane with a walking-stick and in his right hand there was a crumpled map. He didn't need to look at it, he had looked at it the last few days and knew it by heart. He had just taken it out of his bag for precaution, and he thought the next-  
  
“Hello.”  
A female voice made him stumble slightly, and he had to catch himself, loosing the map in the process when his hand got hold of an oak trunk. He turned around.  
A blonde woman was standing a few metres behind him, smiling at him. She had curly hair, very curly hair, and was wearing a black leather jacket along with some faded jeans. And shoes that were obviously not meant for hiking.  
“Hi.” he said.  
“You lost something.” the woman said and pointed at the map on the earthy ground.  
He just looked at her and nodded, but showed no intention of moving. Her hair was really, really curly, and it made him think of red lipstick and prison cells and....Spoilers.  
“What did you just say?”, the woman suddenly said and startled him.  
“Uhm. Spoilers?” he answered, and his chest suddenly hurt. A slight fear made his stomach hurt, too, because he really didn't want to have a heart attack in the middle of the woods, without Jenny around. The sudden sadness in the woman's face didn't help at all.  
“Oh Sweety...” she said, and took a few steps towards him.  
“...What?” he gasped, when not only his chest and stomach hurt, but his head chose to join in too. He bent over a little, loosing his walking-stick and one hand hovering over his chest, one clutching at his head.  
“Oh...my darling, Sweety”, the woman repeated, and suddenly she was next to his bent over figure, a soft hand on the nape of his neck. “Calm down. Please, Sweety.” she said, voice slightly worried and surprisingly demanding.  
“..trying!”, he panted, and tried to reach his walking-stick that was lying next to the crumpled map on some moss.  
  
The hand on his neck disappeared, and the face of the curly haired woman came into his line of view. There was a little smile on her face, and her eyes were beautiful, so beautiful. She said something, hands on his cheeks, but he didn't listen because he could only stare into her eyes, that seemed to be holding much more secrets than she could ever tell.  
And suddenly, just like that, his headache was gone and he could breath again. Like breaking the surface of the ocean, he blinked and then gaped at her, opening his mouth to say something witty and amazed. When the woman took her hands away from his cheeks, he overbalanced and crashed into her, an “Oh my goodness!” on his lips and masses of hair in his eyes.  
The woman whelped and they tumbled onto the ground.  
“Are you alright, Doctor?”, he heard the woman's voice, when he lay on the ground tangled with her, breathing harshly.  
“Yes.”, he replied, already trying to untangle himself. When he was got a hold of his stick, he stood up, knees cracking slightly. He wanted to offer the curly haired woman his hand, but she was already standing, smiling at him from under some curls that were falling wildly into her face.  
“I keep wondering what I did my doctorate in.” he then whispered, watching the face of his counterpart while his head began to feel like it was lined in wadding and his chest started to pulse.  
“Why is that?”, the woman answered softly, frowning a bit and crossing her arms.  
“Once in a while, people call me that. _Doctor_. Like it means something. Jenny confirmed it, it does mean something. She told me I once taught people important things. But I don't remember what I taught them.”  
He shrugged, pretending to be casual, and tried to pull his eyes away from the woman in front of him, but he couldn't. He had to watch her. She cocked her head and smiled at him, the frown gone.  
“You teach people how to survive. You teach people how believe in themselves. You teach people... us how to be brave and to forgive and how to do the things that have to be done.”  
His heart started to hurt again, and suddenly there were tears in his eyes. He felt like floating, only the outline of his world was ragged and sharp, not soft and mild. Through a haze of salty water he saw the woman coming a bit closer. He knew then. He was on the edge of understanding something big, something very important.  
“You teach us that we matter and that we are bigger than we think we are but the universe is still bigger than everything. You teach us when and how to run with whom and you teach us when it's time to go or come home. You teach us everything, Doctor.” The woman's voice cracked at the end and suddenly her hand was on his cheek again, stroking it. The tears in his eyes fell and he finally saw her face clearly. She too had tears running down her cheeks, and suddenly he was filled with love and sadness, his hand coming up and touching the hand on his face.  
“Who are you?”, he rasped.  
A somewhat strangled little laugh came from the woman.  
“I'm Melody. I'm your-”  
“-wife.”.  
“Yes. I'm your wife.”  
“You were in my dreams. But you...”  
“Yes. I looked different.”  
“I didn't understand. You were a baby. How could I possibly be-”  
“You will understand, Sweety.”  
With that, she pulled his face down to her's and their lips met. He expected a sudden headache and colours and pictures, telepathic explanations and answers to everything. A small voice in the back of his mind told him that would be silly, but he didn't listen.  
Instead he tasted strawberries and _your are loved..and by no one more than me_.  
He closed his eyes and swallowed when the woman..Melody, so unfamiliar and yet so intimate, leaned back again.  
“That wasn't the answer.”, she said and he opened his eyes, catching her smile.  
“I figured.” he stated, voice still a bit scratchy. “Melody.”, he then added, letting the sound of it melt on his tongue.  
“I also go by a different name, but that would be to much for today. Want to walk with me, Doctor? I'm dying to meet your daughter!” Melody suddenly said, almost chipper. She took his arm and pulled him forward, until he made one tentative step after the other. His mind was racing and his heart was pounding in his chest. He didn't understand. He hadn't gotten any real answers yet. But he still felt like he was...found. And maybe there would be answers, now that his forgotten past finally had remembered him and decided to come back and find him.  
“How do you know about Jenny?”  
“How could I not know about Jenny?”  
“Why don't I remember...stuff?”  
“You do remember it. You just don't know that yet.”  
She threw a grin at him and he stumbled, too distracted by her and his own self unravelling in front of him. Suddenly his eyes got wide and hist heart made a painful jump.  
“Did Jenny know you were here today? Did Jenny set us up to find each other again?”  
“Oh Sweety..the only person that could answer that is currently asking the questions.”  
He didn't even try to think about that, just blinked heavily and tried to think of the next important question.  
“Who is Sexy?”  
And suddenly he found himself in a fit of laughter, infected by Melody's roaring laughter that carried through the forest, tears streaming down both of their faces. Caught by a wave of emotion and sudden knowing enlightenment, he let go of his walking-stick, grabbed her hand and whispered something in his wife’s ear.  
And they started to run, towards the sweet little hut and Jenny.

___  
End.


End file.
